Today I am 9 days past transfer, and as I went at 6pm to take my pessary, there was brown on the toilet paper.
Instantly, I burst into tears! Today I had allowed myself to be positive. I'd let myself believe that this could work. I let myself believe that I could be pregnant.
As I saw the spotting, I felt stupid and foolish. I hated myself for the pain that I had caused myself.
I immediately dashed to the nearest pregnancy test. I POAS and no second line appeared.
At this moment, my heart just broke. I couldn't bare the pain.
Hubby consoled me. Despite wanting to just lie there for the rest of time, I knew DJ needed me and would be curious where I was. So a quick splash of water and I prepared my 'happy' face. Just then hubby called me and told me to come and have a look.
There it was, the VERY faint second line. It was there, so it gave me the faintest glimmer of hope too.
I will POAS tomorrow morning and see what happens. Until then, please hold on little ones. I can't bare to know you have gone.
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